1 Chronicles 20

Fickle Friends

Absalom is dead and his coup with him. David returns to Jerusalem, his victory undercut by the death of his son. God’s promise that David’s sin would lead to his family living (and dying) by the sword is coming to pass. And during his return to Jerusalem several men from all the tribes of Israel help him return to the palace. But 10 of the tribes are angry that Judah is helping. They insist that David send them away because “where were they before!?”. David rebukes them, but then a man named Sheba tries to lead ANOTHER revolt against David and everyone EXCEPT Judah joins with him! This coup, too, would be shut down, but it shows the dangers of fickle friends. What if David had sent away Judah, and relied on the loyalty of people who would so quickly turn on him?

We cannot allow ourselves to be swayed by popular opinion. We cannot allow ourselves to be held hostage by the opinions of those who would hold their friends over our heads. Listen to the council of a faithful friend, but always weigh it against the truth of Scripture. Most friends come and go and shouldn’t have a place of high influence. But you should absolutely find a Ruth, Jonathan, or Barnabas and be that in return.

Faithful (in every sense of the word) friends > Fickle Friends

2 Samuel 19:30-21:22; 1 Chronicles 20:4-8; Psalm 7

Polygamy & Misdirected Self-Loathing

It’s often pointed out that the Old Testament seems to turn a blind eye to polygamy, even appearing to endorse it in some cases. While this is essentially true outside of the first chapters of Genesis, what we do see consistently throughout the Old Testament is unflinching examination of the consequences of plural marriage. Such is the case with today’s reading.

David’s son Amnon (from David’s wife Ahinoam) develops an infatuation with his half-sister Tamar (from David’s wife Maacah) and devises a plan (with the help of his cousin) to get Tamar alone so he can rape her. This plot is successful, and so Tamar is raped by her half-brother WHILE SHE WAS TRYING TO CARE FOR HIM. How twisted is that? If you subscribe to the Jean-Jacques Rousseau philosophy that humans are inherently good, I submit that history has proved otherwise and Amnon is a prime example. Despite Tamar’s protestations, appeals, and even an offer of marriage, Amnon wanted what he wanted NOW.

But where the story takes a strange twist is after he has finished assaulting his sister, he suddenly hates her more than he ever loved¹ her. She again begs him to at least care for her as the law calls for (Deut 22:28-29), but again he ignores her pleas and has his servants throw her into the street and lock the door. This begs the question; why did he hate her? He got what he wanted. Shouldn’t he be happy? Or at least indifferent? Why the anger? I contend that this is because of misdirected self-loathing.

See, sin is only appealing until you actually get it. Then it sears your conscience and it makes you hate yourself. This leads to all kinds of issues. In this case it became focused on Tamar. Somehow in Amnon’s mind it was HER fault that he had done this thing and he couldn’t stand the sight of her because she was a mirror that showed Amnon the sinful desire that permeated his heart. I’ve no doubt family gathering became awkward after that. Don’t forget that Jerusalem was essentially a government town like Washington, D.C., in the United States or Canberra, A.C.T in Australia. AND Jerusalem was only about 10 acres in size. For context, that’s a little smaller than Yankee Stadium in the Bronx, New York City. There’s no way these people didn’t see each other afterward.

We read that David was angry about this, but for two years no punishment came for Amnon. I mean, how could David punish Amnon for the very crime he had himself committed no so long ago? All the while Tamar’s only full sibling, Absalom, was seething with rage. This ongoing rage culminated in a successful plot to kill Amnon. This action sent David into mourning and Absalom into hiding, further tearing apart the family and this also began to bring to fruition the prophecy Nathan gave about how David’s sins with Bathsheba would cause his family to live and die by the sword.

So we can see how the polygamous lifestyle adopted by David lead to death, destruction, and heartache. When we deviate from God’s design bad things happen. We really shouldn’t act surprised. And what’s more… it may well be that God doesn’t condemn polygamy because history and experience have successfully done so over, and over, and over again.

2 Samuel 12:26-14:33; 1 Chronicles 20:2-3 | 117/365

If such a word can even be applied. The Hebrew word here demonstrates little variation in its basic meaning. The intensity of the meaning ranges from God’s infinite affection for his people to the carnal appetites of a lazy glutton (Robert Alden, Theological Wordbook of the Old Testament). So it is deeply context-dependant. But given the craven nature of the desire and the act, I believe it’s clear that this veers well into the “carnal lust” interpretation and keeps quite clear of the “fatherly love” interpretation.
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Expectations Are A Window Into Your Heart

There is a LOT to discuss in today’s passage and really, this episode could be a mini sermon series unto itself. But I won’t be talking about David’s “affair” with Bathsheba (I use the word “affair” extremely loosely because let’s face it, she was nobody, she wasn’t going to say ‘no’ to the king. This has every earmark of rape). Rather I want to briefly discuss David’s interactions with Bathsheba’s husband, Uriah.

David gets Bathsheba pregnant while her husband is away at war, so he calls him back from the battle for some R&R and expects that Uriah will sleep with his wife and thus muddy the pregnancy timeline creating reasonable doubt that Uriah himself is the father. But, he doesn’t do that. In fact he doesn’t even go home. Not even after David tried to get him drunk. Not while the boys are still at the front, as was the custom at the time:

David replied, “Indeed women have been kept from us, as usual whenever I set out. The men’s bodies are holy even on missions that are not holy. How much more so today!”
1 Samuel 21:5, NIV

David’s weakness was women. Like I talked about before, the enemy uses whatever vector of attack is most promising. And — here is the key — David thinks Uriah will act in the same way he himself would in that circumstance. This is something we all do. We tend assume that people will act the same way we would, this is known in psychology as the False Consensus Effect. And so when we think someone will do something bad or attribute bad motives to people, we should take a beat and think about why. It could be that we are basing our thoughts and assumptions on previous behaviour (by the person in question, or some other individual from our past), but it could also be that we are getting a glimpse into our own hearts. It could be that our assumptions are causing our own worst tendencies, thoughts, and biases to bubble to the surface. Our suspicions and attributions may be exposing our own sin!

This is good news! Because once we know about a thing, we can address it. But it’s only good news if we take the time to actually consider WHY we feel any given way and ask the Lord for help in dealing with it. Otherwise we might end up heading down a dark trail that leads to terrible outcomes… which is exactly what happened to David.

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