Tag: Rape

Polygamy & Misdirected Self-Loathing

It’s often pointed out that the Old Testament seems to turn a blind eye to polygamy, even appearing to endorse it in some cases. While this is essentially true outside of the first chapters of Genesis, what we do see consistently throughout the Old Testament is unflinching examination of the consequences of plural marriage. Such is the case with today’s reading.

David’s son Amnon (from David’s wife Ahinoam) develops an infatuation with his half-sister Tamar (from David’s wife Maacah) and devises a plan (with the help of his cousin) to get Tamar alone so he can rape her. This plot is successful, and so Tamar is raped by her half-brother WHILE SHE WAS TRYING TO CARE FOR HIM. How twisted is that? If you subscribe to the Jean-Jacques Rousseau philosophy that humans are inherently good, I submit that history has proved otherwise and Amnon is a prime example. Despite Tamar’s protestations, appeals, and even an offer of marriage, Amnon wanted what he wanted NOW.

But where the story takes a strange twist is after he has finished assaulting his sister, he suddenly hates her more than he ever loved1 her. She again begs him to at least care for her as the law calls for (Deut 22:28-29), but again he ignores her pleas and has his servants throw her into the street and lock the door. This begs the question; why did he hate her? He got what he wanted. Shouldn’t he be happy? Or at least indifferent? Why the anger? I contend that this is because of misdirected self-loathing.

See, sin is only appealing until you actually get it. Then it sears your conscience and it makes you hate yourself. This leads to all kinds of issues. In this case it became focused on Tamar. Somehow in Amnon’s mind it was HER fault that he had done this thing and he couldn’t stand the sight of her because she was a mirror that showed Amnon the sinful desire that permeated his heart. I’ve no doubt family gathering became awkward after that. Don’t forget that Jerusalem was essentially a government town like Washington, D.C., in the United States or Canberra, A.C.T in Australia. AND Jerusalem was only about 10 acres in size. For context, that’s a little smaller than Yankee Stadium in the Bronx, New York City. There’s no way these people didn’t see each other afterward.

We read that David was angry about this, but for two years no punishment came for Amnon. I mean, how could David punish Amnon for the very crime he had himself committed no so long ago? All the while Tamar’s only full sibling, Absalom, was seething with rage. This ongoing rage culminated in a successful plot to kill Amnon. This action sent David into mourning and Absalom into hiding, further tearing apart the family and this also began to bring to fruition the prophecy Nathan gave about how David’s sins with Bathsheba would cause his family to live and die by the sword.

So we can see how the polygamous lifestyle adopted by David lead to death, destruction, and heartache. When we deviate from God’s design bad things happen. We really shouldn’t act surprised. And what’s more… it may well be that God doesn’t condemn polygamy because history and experience have successfully done so over, and over, and over again.

2 Samuel 12:26-14:33; 1 Chronicles 20:2-3 | 117/365
  1. If such a word can even be applied. The Hebrew word here demonstrates little variation in its basic meaning. The intensity of the meaning ranges from God’s infinite affection for his people to the carnal appetites of a lazy glutton (Robert Alden, Theological Wordbook of the Old Testament). So it is deeply context-dependant. But given the craven nature of the desire and the act, I believe it’s clear that this veers well into the “carnal lust” interpretation and keeps quite clear of the “fatherly love” interpretation.
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