Deuteronomy 22

Polygamy & Misdirected Self-Loathing

It’s often pointed out that the Old Testament seems to turn a blind eye to polygamy, even appearing to endorse it in some cases. While this is essentially true outside of the first chapters of Genesis, what we do see consistently throughout the Old Testament is unflinching examination of the consequences of plural marriage. Such is the case with today’s reading.

David’s son Amnon (from David’s wife Ahinoam) develops an infatuation with his half-sister Tamar (from David’s wife Maacah) and devises a plan (with the help of his cousin) to get Tamar alone so he can rape her. This plot is successful, and so Tamar is raped by her half-brother WHILE SHE WAS TRYING TO CARE FOR HIM. How twisted is that? If you subscribe to the Jean-Jacques Rousseau philosophy that humans are inherently good, I submit that history has proved otherwise and Amnon is a prime example. Despite Tamar’s protestations, appeals, and even an offer of marriage, Amnon wanted what he wanted NOW.

But where the story takes a strange twist is after he has finished assaulting his sister, he suddenly hates her more than he ever loved1 her. She again begs him to at least care for her as the law calls for (Deut 22:28-29), but again he ignores her pleas and has his servants throw her into the street and lock the door. This begs the question; why did he hate her? He got what he wanted. Shouldn’t he be happy? Or at least indifferent? Why the anger? I contend that this is because of misdirected self-loathing.

See, sin is only appealing until you actually get it. Then it sears your conscience and it makes you hate yourself. This leads to all kinds of issues. In this case it became focused on Tamar. Somehow in Amnon’s mind it was HER fault that he had done this thing and he couldn’t stand the sight of her because she was a mirror that showed Amnon the sinful desire that permeated his heart. I’ve no doubt family gathering became awkward after that. Don’t forget that Jerusalem was essentially a government town like Washington, D.C., in the United States or Canberra, A.C.T in Australia. AND Jerusalem was only about 10 acres in size. For context, that’s a little smaller than Yankee Stadium in the Bronx, New York City. There’s no way these people didn’t see each other afterward.

We read that David was angry about this, but for two years no punishment came for Amnon. I mean, how could David punish Amnon for the very crime he had himself committed no so long ago? All the while Tamar’s only full sibling, Absalom, was seething with rage. This ongoing rage culminated in a successful plot to kill Amnon. This action sent David into mourning and Absalom into hiding, further tearing apart the family and this also began to bring to fruition the prophecy Nathan gave about how David’s sins with Bathsheba would cause his family to live and die by the sword.

So we can see how the polygamous lifestyle adopted by David lead to death, destruction, and heartache. When we deviate from God’s design bad things happen. We really shouldn’t act surprised. And what’s more… it may well be that God doesn’t condemn polygamy because history and experience have successfully done so over, and over, and over again.

2 Samuel 12:26-14:33; 1 Chronicles 20:2-3 | 117/365
  1. If such a word can even be applied. The Hebrew word here demonstrates little variation in its basic meaning. The intensity of the meaning ranges from God’s infinite affection for his people to the carnal appetites of a lazy glutton (Robert Alden, Theological Wordbook of the Old Testament). So it is deeply context-dependant. But given the craven nature of the desire and the act, I believe it’s clear that this veers well into the “carnal lust” interpretation and keeps quite clear of the “fatherly love” interpretation.
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Excluded from the Kingdom?

If you read Deuteronomy 23:1-8 and are NOT a Biblical savant you probably scratched your head and thought… wut? Seriously. What does this even mean? I’ll put the whole section in here for context:

23:1 A man with crushed or severed genitals may not enter the assembly of the Lord. A person of illegitimate birth may not enter the assembly of the Lord; to the tenth generation no one related to him may do so. No Ammonite or Moabite may enter the assembly of the Lord; to the tenth generation none of their descendants shall ever do so, for they did not meet you with food and water on the way as you came from Egypt, and furthermore, they hired Balaam son of Beor of Pethor in Aram Naharaim to curse you. But the Lord your God refused to listen to Balaam and changedthe curse to a blessing, for the Lord your God loves you. You must not seek peace and prosperity for them through all the ages to come. You must not hate an Edomite, for he is your relative; you must not hate an Egyptian, for you lived as a foreigner in his land. Children of the third generation born to them may enter the assembly of the Lord.

So our list of people who are not allowed to join the assembly of the Lord are 1) eunuchs, 2) a person of illegitimate birth (or their descendants), 3) Ammonites & Moabites (or their descendants, and 4) Edomites & Egyptians (for a little while).

We CAN make sense of this, but it requires a little background knowledge. So let’s look first at what the “assembly of the Lord” is and then why these groups might be excluded.

ASSEMBLY OF THE LORD — I don’t want to belabour this, so let’s do a 10,000-foot overview here. But this does NOT refer to the general Hebrew/Christian/faith community. We see multiple examples of this in Scripture. Not to mention that this passage would then contradict things written both before AND after this passage. Also, while arguments are made for various interpretations of this phrase, I believe that the following is the superior explanation. This “assembly” is a guiding/governing assembly who will direct Israel (cf: Num 16:3; Jud 21:5,8; 1 Ki 12:3; Jer 26:17; Eze 16:40, 23:45-47; Mic 2:5).

So why would these people be excluded from that group?

EUNICHS — There are two primary reasons this group might be excluded. self-castration was closely related to paganism AND since Eunuchs could not have children, I can see why there would be concerns about how they might govern in light of that.

ILLEGITIMATE BIRTH — This was a person born of incest, adultery, or prostitution. These people are from broken homes. God would never exclude these people from his family, He cares for them. But having come from a broken home myself and despite having a dedicated mother who cared deeply about me, I still didn’t understand what made a good father or a healthy family. These people are not in a position to lead a nation. They need to focus on getting themselves straightened out.

AMMONITES & MOABITES — This group proved themselves to be enemies of Israel (as it says in the passage) so they clearly could not be trusted with positions of national leadership!

EDOMITES & EGYPTIANS — Edomites came from Esau, Jacob’s brother and the Egyptians (the people, not the abusive government… always worth remembering that the government ≠ the people) hosted them as sojourners.

Hopefully that helps you understand what I think is the best theory as to why this prohibition is in place AND what it actually IS.

Deuteronomy 21:10-25:19 | 077/365